Monday, November 2, 2009

Flight to LA or The Crazy Bitch in Row 17

im on an airplane right now (the big move) and shit is going down is entertaining. My plane is empty. i have an entire row to myself. the row in front of me is occupied only by one blonde woman with uggs and attitude. She's pretty loud and grating and starts talking/flirting with the guy in front of her...and drinking. she's drunk. She's getting louder. I'm watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, so really... im totally fine--cant even hear them. then the guy across from her asks politely if she could keep it down a little (we're on a red-eye). Well this crazy bitch FLIPS out. I'm watching her lips flale and arms flap and i take off my headphones to HEAR HER yelling "Are you kidding me? are you FUCKING kidding me?! I'm not going to lower MY voice, i've had enough of you people...i want a double drink, i want to sit here. move HIM."
Flight attendants emerge from every corner of the plane to calm this bitch down, " Are YOU kidding me? I'm going to talk to Richard Branson. I've had it with you people. I will be talking to the FBI, Ground control, Virgin American Security. ... This is BULLSHIT!!"
Really, it was fun to watch and to be so close to. this attendent dude put the smack down too. i have to give him credit.
He is like... "Don't cause a scene... we're trying to be accomodating...everyone is fine. you're the one with the problem. I suggest you do call richard branson." --he looks at me "has she been like this the whole time?"
"She's wacky, " i said.
She huffed and bristled and pouted while slurping the last of her vodka tonic through her tiny straw.

Moral of this story: EXPERIENCE DESIGN things don't always go right. How does your brand deal with problems? This was a funny experience to witness, to be a part of even. Virgin could choreograph outbursts like that, just for pure theater. maybe it would be awesome? reality television in action.

I'm moving to L.A.

UPDATE: She's been handed a "Cease & Desist" notice to read over. i think it's the equivalent of a last warning before she's fucked. I'm trying to read it through the cracks in the seat. no dice. Looks official though. She's popping pills. She sleeps .
Virgin Onboard is awesome.